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Dear Chile It was a good description I really felt like I was actually there! There were a few mistakes but don't worry about it although I didn't like the part when you said ' there was a cave sitting on his iron butt' I thought that was a bit silly but otherwise it was a good description:) well done.
— turtle and jaguar
Hi Chile I love the story and I feel like I was in the story! here are some positives! -The scene description -Tension ("I looked to my left and Right) Now a negative! :) - I would recommend on the end of paragraph 1 maybe put like who is this? thank you for spending your time reading my comment ! :) Toffolo out
— Georgia